How is your relationship with time?

I can’t say that I have a love-hate relationship with time but my feelings about it vary due to the circumstances… Perhaps that’s no surprise but my experience of it does take very different shapes.

What about you—when is the last time you thought deeply about how you engage with time?

In general, I tend to run toward deadlines because I like that feeling of some, but not too much, pressure.  Honestly, I prefer if someone else imposes it. When I make a deadline for myself, unless there is a deliverable to a client or a colleague, I am likely to postpone the task if something more urgent or interesting arises.

I noticed just the other day, as I was working on a project that I had given myself enough time to be able to think very creatively about what I wanted to accomplish. I had space to let my mind wander, really engage in some divergent thinking before shifting into reaching decisions and conclusions. This experience of giving myself an abundance of time to imagine, change my mind, make new connections, experiment, and revisit ideas, was outside my pattern of thinking and doing, and enabled me to really consider a variety of perspectives and possibilities. My approach and process felt quite different and enabled me to realize richer results. It was great! Upon reflection, I’m realizing I need to find that balance between feeling the welcome pressure of a deadline and having enough time to explore deeply, draft a design or plan, revise, and develop/move forward with the final design.

What’s your pattern? How does it serve you? Would you like your habit to be just a bit different, to gain even more from your experiences?

This lovely experience also has me re-thinking how I talk about myself, how I see myself as a result of discovering and develop this new relationship of time. I am no longer imagining and describing myself solely as a person who talks, works, and makes decisions “New York fast.” I will say though, that there is a challenge in this spacious feeling and generating so many ideas that the convergent thinking process becomes longer and more involved—but that is a “happy problem” and I’m fine with it!

 

Perhaps my feeling was also an aspect of that particular experience’s nature and composition —I was so deeply engaged in the work and play of the project the I was in a state of flow… I lost track of time, having given myself permission to devote as much time as I wanted to this task. Of course, I don’t often have that luxury, though I think that there’s something for me to learn about this. I believe that it’s consistently dreaming about what I want more of, then designing those experiences, because I LOVED the generatively that was possible when I gave myself free rein to create.

Appreciating Life!

I’ll be honest, last week was a tough one for me, my family and friends, for our nation, and for the world.

How did you cope effectively last week?

What tools do you have at the ready for times of challenge or distress?

Were you able to find glimmers of joy in your days?

I found that I needed to really lean into my Appreciative Inquiry practice. One of my favorite tools from the Appreciative Living Learning Circle I am hosting is the creation and use of “Goodness Glasses.” (I created my very tangible reminder with a pair of extra glasses, a hot glue gun, and beads.)

My glasses remind me and help me to choose where I focus my attention. While I acknowledge what is, I consciously decide to look for the positive or the good that may be well-hidden in the situation, challenge, or feeling that I am experiencing.

I’ve been sure to keep up with my gratitude list too. I devote five to seven minutes each morning to reflecting on the previous day. My list-making and contemplation keep me feeling grounded and fortunate. These are simple, quite easily accomplished, and relatively quick techniques—that is, in part, the charm of them. They buoy me up when things start feeling difficult, heavy or on the verge of overwhelming.

 

What do you do to re-direct your attention to awareness of what is going well for you?

In this new week, I’m doing a lot of visioning work and play. Whether it’s trying to imagine the future of this country and my place in it, the next 18 months of my business or the integration of AI into the lives of the women in the Appreciative Living Learning Circle, as we have our last session this week. The five principles of AI are almost always in my mind. I’ve been inspired to create visuals of each of the principles, to keep them foremost in our minds. Here are a few of those drawings.

Where are you in this moment?

Are you searching for more joy in your life, realizing that we find what we look for… and maybe there’s something to be learned about that seeking process? If so, I hope you will join the next circle I am hosting, beginning December 7th.

Here are the comments from participants in one of the circles…

I had no idea what to expect from the Appreciative Living Learning Circle, but I certainly wasn’t anticipating a material impact on my well-being so quickly. In just a few short weeks I find myself far better equipped (and likely) to access the power of gratitude even in challenging moments. It’s a game-changer!      L. Clark

These Appreciative Living learning circles have been delightful. It’s almost magical how this simple process illuminates the many moments of joy that otherwise easily go unnoticed. I realize now that I’ve generally thought of joy and happiness as something to achieve – a destination to reach – rather than a state of mind/body feeling that is genuinely accessible in almost any moment of my day. Thank you, Jill, for facilitating this transformative experience for us!       S. Steigerwaldt

You can find details about the circle on my calendar. And please, reach out to me with your questions about Appreciative Living, the circles, and the AI coaching that I offer.